Could I really be Captivating?

Over the summer, I felt the Lord nudging me to re-read Captivating by John & Stasi Eldredge. I rarely re-read a book unless it's had a major impact on my heart (i.e., The Shack - I've read it four times!).

Because I am a learner, I purchased the "revised and expanded version" along with the DVDs. I figured that if the Lord has something to say to me, then I'm all ears. I'll buy the book, the movie, the Cliffsnotes, even the Spanish version if I have to! I'll learn the lesson, implement the changes, and move on with the rest of my summer.

However, as I began to read, I understood more and more that it wasn't about the itemized list of issues that I had conjured up. It wasn't about my stinky attitude, the length of my quiet time, or the the spring cleaning that has now gone into summer. Jesus was wooing me. He was pursuing something in me that has yet to be revealed. He wants me to be free.

Watching the DVDs has been especially wonderful. The Eldredge's have a deep understanding of the feminine heart. Stasi is strong, yet without offense and the ladies who partner with her are beautifully vulnerable. I have yet to sit through a DVD session with dry eyes!

The feminine heart is deeply, deeply, deeply connected to Jesus. He wants us to know that we ARE beautiful, that He has a grand adventure planned for each of us, and that He delights in us. The King IS enthralled by our beauty (Psalm 45:11).

But do I really believe that? Do you?

There's so much to my life story. There's so much yuckiness that blurs any beauty that I can see. The Good News is that His appreciation of my beauty is driven by His love for me. It's not dependent on me, but dependent on His holy perspective of His creation. I AM His Beloved whether I feel like it or not. That's the Truth about me and that makes me Captivating.

I am continuing on this journey. I'm not done and neither is He.

In the distance I can hear the freedom bells ringing...and they toll just for me.